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Welcome to the community!
By just looking at the diagram I think you don’t have enough “player moments”.
I can see there are only 4 points in which the player can make a choice, that can work if the story is really good, but that usually makes this type of game really unsatisfactory because the player feels like the game is being played by itself. Of course, this feedback is actually kinda useless without seeing the final game. Just keep at it and show your game!
Your feedback really helps a lot, thanks